How to terminate parental rights without a lawyer
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN

I am pregnant and my current fiance [we will be married when the baby comes] is going to adopt our child. The biological father lives in CA and is a complete apathetic deadbeat. He has agreed to sign away his rights but refuses to get a lawyer. We cannot afford a lawyer either nor can we travel to CA anytime soon or vise versa. I was wondering, if I send him the form, is there any way to get it notarized w/o his presence, like if he sends it back can a notary just sign it? Any other way to go about this?

Since I wasn't married to him anyway, is it really necessary?

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Today, 07:27 PM #2 Proserpina Proserpina is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? TN

I am pregnant and my current fiance [we will be married when the baby comes] is going to adopt our child. The biological father lives in CA and is a complete apathetic deadbeat. He has agreed to sign away his rights but refuses to get a lawyer. We cannot afford a lawyer either nor can we travel to CA anytime soon or vise versa. I was wondering, if I send him the form, is there any way to get it notarized w/o his presence, like if he sends it back can a notary just sign it? Any other way to go about this?

Since I wasn't married to him anyway, is it really necessary?
Don't you dare sit there and call him a deadbeat. He owes you nothing, hence he is by no means a deadbeat.

If you are married when you give birth, your husband is the presumed father anyway so you may wash away the biological father's existence to that extent.

Of course, he can change his mind later and file to disestablish your husband's legal paternity.

You're welcome.

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Today, 07:46 PM #3 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by Proserpina View Post
Don't you dare sit there and call him a deadbeat. He owes you nothing, hence he is by no means a deadbeat.

If you are married when you give birth, your husband is the presumed father anyway so you may wash away the biological father's existence to that extent.

Of course, he can change his mind later and file to disestablish your husband's legal paternity.

You're welcome.
Okay, so dude gets me pregnant and I'm the only one responsible... sure.

Today, 07:48 PM #4 Tgif Tgif is online now
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And I'm sure you're the type of guy who goes around and knocks up women without a care.

You don't know this man, before I got engaged he refused to take responsibility. Deadbeat. And I'll say it... my fiance is a real man

Today, 07:53 PM #5 cbg cbg is offline
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LEGALLY he does not owe you a single thing until AFTER the baby is born AND he is legally declared the father by the court, or by whatever other system is determined by your state legislature.

And Pro is a she.

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Today, 07:55 PM #6 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by cbg View Post
LEGALLY he does not owe you a single thing until AFTER the baby is born AND he is legally declared the father by the court, or by whatever other system is determined by your state legislature.

And Pro is a she.
SHE has no right to get smart with me. That's all I wanted to know... my family has been insisting that I contact him because he has RIGHTS. If I don't need anything from him, fine. That's all I wanted to know.

Sometimes I think people go on the internet just to be rude.

I define deadbeat as a man who has no job and takes no responsibility for his life. I'd like you to have a conversation with this man and see if you still defend him.

K, I got my question answered, albeit rudely. Now I'm done because I don't enjoy being attacked for simply asking a question.

You're welcome: rollseyes:

Last edited by Tgif; Today at 07:58 PM.

Today, 07:57 PM #7 Silverplum Silverplum is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
And I'm sure you're the type of guy who goes around and knocks up women without a care.

You don't know this man, before I got engaged he refused to take responsibility. Deadbeat. And I'll say it... my fiance is a real man
You're asking for help on a legal site. Act like a sensible grownup.

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Today, 07:58 PM #8 Silverplum Silverplum is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
SHE has no right to get smart with me. That's all I wanted to know... my family has been insisting that I contact him because he has RIGHTS. If I don't need anything from him, fine. That's all I wanted to know.

Sometimes I think people go on the internet just to be rude.

I define deadbeat as a man who has no job and takes no responsibility for his life. I'd like you to have a conversation with this man and see if you still defend him.

K, I got my question answered, albeit rudely. Now I'm done because I don't enjoy being attacked for simply asking a question.
Run along, now.

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Today, 07:58 PM #9 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by cbg View Post
LEGALLY he does not owe you a single thing until AFTER the baby is born AND he is legally declared the father by the court, or by whatever other system is determined by your state legislature.

And Pro is a she.
Oh come on. I LOVE the fact that Pro is running around impregnating women. She could earn a fortune from that. Or at least a spot in Ripley's!

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Today, 08:00 PM #10 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Silverplum View Post
You're asking for help on a legal site. Act like a sensible grownup.
Shoot. And yet I just called her a whore or a slut -- whichever she prefers. Nothing at all sensible or grownup about that. Been a weekend. Call me and I will tell you

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Today, 08:00 PM #11 Proserpina Proserpina is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
And I'm sure you're the type of guy who goes around and knocks up women without a care.

You don't know this man, before I got engaged he refused to take responsibility. Deadbeat. And I'll say it... my fiance is a real man

And you're the type of woman who gets knocked up by such losers, also without a care.

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Today, 08:01 PM #12 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
Shoot. And yet I just called her a whore or a slut -- whichever she prefers. Nothing at all sensible or grownup about that. Been a weekend. Call me and I will tell you
You don't know me nor my situation.

Today, 08:01 PM #13 mommyanme mommyanme is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
SHE has no right to get smart with me. That's all I wanted to know... my family has been insisting that I contact him because he has RIGHTS. If I don't need anything from him, fine. That's all I wanted to know.

Sometimes I think people go on the internet just to be rude.

I define deadbeat as a man who has no job and takes no responsibility for his life. I'd like you to have a conversation with this man and see if you still defend him.

K, I got my question answered, albeit rudely. Now I'm done because I don't enjoy being attacked for simply asking a question.

You're welcome: rollseyes:
Did he rape you? No
K, then, Bye Bye now

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Today, 08:02 PM #14 Proserpina Proserpina is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
SHE has no right to get smart with me. That's all I wanted to know... my family has been insisting that I contact him because he has RIGHTS. If I don't need anything from him, fine. That's all I wanted to know.

Sometimes I think people go on the internet just to be rude.

I define deadbeat as a man who has no job and takes no responsibility for his life. I'd like you to have a conversation with this man and see if you still defend him.

K, I got my question answered, albeit rudely. Now I'm done because I don't enjoy being attacked for simply asking a question.

You're welcome: rollseyes:
You have such awesome taste in men.

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Today, 08:03 PM #15 Proserpina Proserpina is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
You don't know me nor my situation.
Oh hon, you're here every day, multiple times. Every single day. Only the screen-name and (sometimes) the state ever change.

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Quote Originally Posted by Proserpina View Post
And you're the type of woman who gets knocked up by such losers, also without a care.
I'm going to raise a ****ing kid. I'm not aborting my child.

I'm sorry I even asked the question.

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Today, 08:03 PM #17 mommyanme mommyanme is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
You don't know me nor my situation.
We know you laid down for a loser/deadbeat as you call him, got impregnated, then found a "real man" in less than 9 months, whom you are marrying and don't know.

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Today, 08:03 PM #18 Tgif Tgif is online now
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I said i'm sorry shut the **** up now

Today, 08:07 PM #19 Tgif Tgif is online now
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I'm sorry that you harbor so much anger and hatred that you have to attack a stranger on the internet. This is why I don't ever ask questions.

Today, 08:07 PM #20 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
You don't know me nor my situation.
I know hundreds like you. You slept with a man to whom you were not married and now you think he owes you something because you spread your legs and are pregnant.

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Today, 08:07 PM #21 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I said i'm sorry shut the **** up now
Such language and class you have. Can tell you are well educated... NOT.

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Today, 08:08 PM #22 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I'm going to raise a ****ing kid. I'm not aborting my child.

I'm sorry I even asked the question.
Poor child.

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Today, 08:08 PM #23 I'mTheFather I'mTheFather is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I said i'm sorry shut the **** up now
You said you were sorry you even asked a question.

And anyone who describes her child as a ****ing kid doesn't deserve the privilege.

ETA: Oops, wrong pronoun.

Last edited by I'mTheFather; Today at 08:12 PM.
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Today, 08:11 PM #24 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by I'mTheFather View Post
You said you were sorry you even asked a question.

And anyone who describes she child as a ****ing kid doesn't deserve the privilege.
I WASN'T. TALKING ABOUT THE CHILD.

I'm hurt by the comments. And I say things I don't mean. I'm not a thick skinned person so keep beating me up.

Yes I am the loser who is crying right now.

Call me as many names as you want.

I'm your punching bag

You're going to say: I'm having a pity party. I'm weak.

Today, 08:11 PM #25 I'mTheFather I'mTheFather is offline
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The anger in this thread is due to a pregnant woman coming online to bash the man with whom she saw fit to have sex and a child. There was a classier way to ask your question. You chose the gutter way.

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Today, 08:12 PM #26 mommyanme mommyanme is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I'm sorry that you harbor so much anger and hatred that you have to attack a stranger on the internet. This is why I don't ever ask questions.
You attacked the stranger, on the internet, in an open forum, that you were impregnated by, call an unborn child a F'n kid, and have found an innocent man to pity you enough to marry you.
You my dear opened that can all on your own, OWN your choices.

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Today, 08:13 PM #27 cbg cbg is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I'm going to raise a ****ing kid. I'm not aborting my child.

I'm sorry I even asked the question.
I don't see where anyone suggested that you should abort.

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Today, 08:14 PM #28 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by mommyanme View Post
You attacked the stranger, on the internet, in an open forum, that you were impregnated by, call an unborn child a F'n kid, and have found an innocent man to pity you enough to marry you.
You my dear opened that can all on your own, OWN your choices.

I'm pregnant. I have hormones. I attacked him because I know him as a person. Yes I had sex with him. And I'm paying for it, trust me.

I already know I am a horrible person. Okay?

I attacked him because I am stressed.

I attacked the PP because I didn't so anything to her and she got smart with me.

Today, 08:15 PM #29 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by cbg View Post
I don't see where anyone suggested that you should abort.
No I was saying I am taking resposbility by raising the child.

How many more people are going to "like" the comments that hurt me.

33 so far. Let's try and get to 100. As a matter of fact, I'm going to go and like your bashing comments.

Last edited by Tgif; Today at 08:18 PM.

Today, 08:17 PM #30 mommyanme mommyanme is offline
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You need to grow up before this baby is born and own yourself and your mistakes, instead of making excuses. YOU are that baby's role model and only YOU!
Part of that means OWNING the FATHER you chose instead of replacing him illegally. Because he could grow up later and reverse that and you'll have a confused and angry child who will see you as a liar.

Last edited by m martin; Today at 09:38 PM. When you are asking for free advice from strangers on the internet, it would behoove you to remember that they do not owe you anything either, and instead of attacking them when you do not like the answer you would be better served by taking what you can use and dropping the rest.

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Today, 08:17 PM #32 Ohiogal Ohiogal is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I'm pregnant. I have hormones. I attacked him because I know him as a person. Yes I had sex with him. And I'm paying for it, trust me.

I already know I am a horrible person. Okay?

I attacked him because I am stressed.

I attacked the PP because I didn't so anything to her and she got smart with me.
No one was mean to you until you went on the attack. Proserpina said nothing wrong to you. YOU chose to be a jerk. Try to reexamine yourself. YOU chose this man. He has a right to be a father when you PROVE he is the father. You are pregnant and already involved with another guy you plan to marry. Not exactly saying a lot for your monogamy or ability to get to know someone before leaping into bed. Why should this other man believe he is the father when you don't exactly seem to wait until the sheets are changed before getting another partner?

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Today, 08:19 PM #33 I'mTheFather I'mTheFather is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
No I was saying I am taking resposbility by raising the child.

How many more people are going to "like" the comments that hurt me.

33 so far. Let's try and get to 100. As a matter of fact, I'm going to go and like your bashing comments.
If you're that thin-skinned, then you ought to refrain from referring to anyone else negatively. Remember, what goes around, comes around.

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Today, 08:25 PM #34 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by Ohiogal View Post
No one was mean to you until you went on the attack. Proserpina said nothing wrong to you. YOU chose to be a jerk. Try to reexamine yourself. YOU chose this man. He has a right to be a father when you PROVE he is the father. You are pregnant and already involved with another guy you plan to marry. Not exactly saying a lot for your monogamy or ability to get to know someone before leaping into bed. Why should this other man believe he is the father when you don't exactly seem to wait until the sheets are changed before getting another partner?
I dated my fiance for a long time in high school/college. We were separated for years and I was with my child's father for about 2 months. I did choose him. I never claimed to be a good person. I found out I was pregnant after I had already left him for being a jerk. I contacted him right away and he didn't care at all and wasn't even willing to take a test after. H e wanted nothing to with the baby. I got back with my fiance at 3 months pregnant. I am now 6 months.

I called him a deadbeat but admitted I ****ed him. And Yes, I know people can be as cruel as they want. I didn't WANT to ask a bunch of strangers a question. It was the word deadbeat that set you off... I made a comment about someone I know personally and made an error in doing so.

Today, 08:26 PM #35 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by I'mTheFather View Post
If you're that thin-skinned, then you ought to refrain from referring to anyone else negatively. Remember, what goes around, comes around.
It's one thing if the person actually knows me.

And maybe he didn't rape me but he was verbally abusive. Maybe I deserved it.

Today, 08:27 PM #36 Silverplum Silverplum is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
I dated my fiance for a long time in high school/college. We were separated for years and I was with my child's father for about 2 months. I did choose him. I never claimed to be a good person. I found out I was pregnant after I had already left him for being a jerk. I contacted him right away and he didn't care at all and wasn't even willing to take a test after. H e wanted nothing to with the baby. I got back with my fiance at 3 months pregnant. I am now 6 months.

I called him a deadbeat but admitted I ****ed him. And Yes, I know people can be as cruel as they want. I didn't WANT to ask a bunch of strangers a question. It was the word deadbeat that set you off... I made a comment about someone I know personally and made an error in doing so.
Lose the gutter language, toots. You are not amongst friends.

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Today, 08:28 PM #37 Tgif Tgif is online now
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Quote Originally Posted by Silverplum View Post
Lose the gutter language, toots. You are not amongst friends.
Yes, I'm a whore according to you.

43 likes now. Good job.

Today, 08:33 PM #38 Silverplum Silverplum is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
Yes, I'm a whore according to you.

43 likes now. Good job.
Nope, 'whore' is not a word I use.

Go lie down, rest, and hire an attorney tomorrow to protect your baby's best interests.

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Today, 09:21 PM #39 stealth2 stealth2 is offline
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Oh, little girl. So you got pregnant, and are engaged to a different man before even spawning? Wow. You're lucky you are not my child. Hand would be at the back of your head in a hot minute.

Add to that mouthing off at the people you are asking for FREE advice? Go pay a lawyer.

And I didn't even get past your second post.

How old are you, anyway?

Last edited by stealth2; Today at 09:33 PM.
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Today, 09:26 PM #40 stealth2 stealth2 is offline
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Quote Originally Posted by Tgif View Post
Now I'm done
So why are you still here and posting after stating you're done?